19

I feel like nothing
I feel like I haven't done much
but I feel like I've done alot only when I remember

As life goes on
So do we
Happy Birthday to me....?

After all those frivolous celebrations for the past 18 years
Going to church for Easter service
and eating dinner is all I feel like doing this year
Yet that sounds selfish in itself

But I feel empty about it
I feel indifferent to this 19th year
I don't care if only 4 people say Happy Birthday to me
I don't care if I don't spend it with my family
I don't care if no one says Happy Birthday to me
Or at least I should have that kind of heart

I care that at least I have someone to spend it with
At least that's what I've come to realize
And I should be thankful for everything that I have

I guess this is me growing up
Realizing that your one tiny fish out in a vast deep blue sea

I've been looking forward to this day for the past 18 years
But for this 19th year I didn't even realize it's been 365 days past the last celebration
I wasn't even counting the days down
I didn't even realize it was my birthday till I entered my dorm and saw
A sign saying Celebrate Easter on April 4th
15 minutes ago

I guess that shows how much I've grown
Or I guess that shows how much I don't care anymore
But here it is
Happy Birthday to me....

Thank You God for letting me see another beautiful day
Thank You God for letting me experience life and being able to realize I'm growing up
Thank You God for giving me the opportunities I have had
Thank You God for giving me everything I have ever wanted or needed
Thank You God for giving me Family and Friends
And Thank You God for the Best Present ever - making me realize you provide me with everything every second of everyday